Of third wheels and stupid zombies
by bean-of-nerves
Summary: Being stuck with his sister and her boyfriend on Saturday night was the last thing King wanted, but apparently, he has no choice. When he is also forced to watch an atrocious movie, he really begins to despair. At least, until he notices the girl sitting next to him. Modern AU, Kiane


**A/N: **

This is the first time I'm posting something here! I started writing because I couldn't find many Kiane fics, so I decided to try to do something about it. English is not my first language, so even though I reread this several times you will probably find some mistakes. If you find something wrong, please let me know, you'll make me a favor.

In this AU Gloxinia is King and Elaine's uncle and he raised them with Gerheade after their parents' death.

* * *

_**Of third wheels and stupid zombies**_

King snorts, probably for the twelfth time in half-an-hour, trying to convince himself not to leave. Elaine ignores him, of course. She's too busy cuddling with Ban. In the middle of the damn line, in front of everyone, including her brother.

He really doesn't want to be here, in a movie theater, waiting to see a stupid zombie-movie, with his sisters and her boyfriend, but his uncle has been clear. Apparently, it's his sacred duty as a big brother to watch over Elaine, making sure that her boyfriend doesn't try to be too ... affectionate. Like he could stop them.

Ban and Elaine have been a couple for more than a year, now, so King strongly doubts that he could do anything about them being together in every way. Of course, he doesn't like that. When they ended up together he was less than thrilled. King and Ban have been in the same group of friends since middle school, but their relationship has always been a bit ... complicated. King has always considered Ban as a loud idiot, and the fact that the other man always makes fun of him doesn't help.

But Elaine loves him. It's obvious. And, apparently, Ban loves her too. He looks at her like she is the best thing in the universe, he listens to her and he's caring with her. King has never seen him like this, before. So, although he keeps thinking that his sister has an awful taste in men, he's ok with this.

His uncle is not. Gloxinia has always been a bit overprotective of Elaine, and he's not happy to see her with a man with Ban's appearance and reputation. Therefore when he discovered that Elaine would go on a date with him, he practically forced King to go with them.

So, here he is, being the third wheel with his sister and her boyfriend, he hopes for the last time in his entire life. The fact that he has accepted their relationship doesn't mean that he actually wants to watch them doing stuff. And now they are kissing again!

"Please, can you wait until we enter the theater?", King mutters, looking away.

Thank God, they break away. "You know, you can always let us alone," Ban says, sounding annoyed.

King snorts. Again. "Oh, yes, because I'm here by choice. I really wanted to pass Saturday night with you two!"

"Well, you can leave", Elaine points out. "You can go to Helbram. I won't say to uncle Gloxinia that you left". That's for sure, King thinks. She didn't want him to be here in the first place.

It's not like he didn't think about simply leaving her with Ban and then returning before they come home. But in the end, he doesn't want to risk. "Elaine, you know our uncle has eyes everywhere. He would know. And next time, he will come with you himself."

Elaine makes a face. "Ow, please don't make me think about this."

"Look," King finally says, "I swear I'll leave you two seat alone once we'll be in the theater. I'm not interested to see you two making out during the movie."

"Yeah, better for you to do this", mumbles Ban, before holding Elaine and kissing her again.

King closes his eyes and breathes in. The line is proceeding. This will end soon. He can do it. Or, at least, he hopes so.

Finally, they enter the theater, clearly after Ban forced them to wait in another line just because he wanted popcorn. And, as can be expected, the theater is packed. By this time, King just wants to take a seat and forget his current situation, possibly as far as possible from Ban and Elaine.

"I'll go look for a seat. We'll meet later, after the movie. Okay?" He asks, but he's not sure Elaine can hear him with all the noise that fills the room.

Apparently, Ban understands, because he nods and grabs Elaine's wrist before get away. They soon disappear in the crowd. King sighs, finally alone, then starts looking for a seat. At that moment, the lights turn off. He rolls his eyes. Of course, that would happen. Why not?

The screen makes enough light to allow him finding a seat in one of the lasts lines, so by the beginning of the movie he can finally seat. Well, that wasn't so bad, he thinks and begins to relax a bit. Yes, the theater is full and dirty, and he can barely see the screen. But at least he's not forced anymore to watch his sister making out with her boyfriend. He's not particularly interested in the movie he's about to watch – clearly Ban chose it, but it can't be worse that Ban and Elaine, right?

Of course, he is wrong.

Usually, King is not squeamish, and he's not particularly scared by horror movies, especially when it's about stupid zombie movies with almost no plot and a lot of stupid characters. He personally prefers psychological horror, for the simple fact that those kind of movies are at least interesting. He's not even impressed by blood or gruesome killing.  
But this ... this is too much.

He suppresses a groan when a girl – another – is torn apart in the most brutal way possible by a group of zombies. Ad all because she thought that to hide in a bloody greenhouse – a _greenhouse! _– was a good idea. King shakes his head. She probably deserved to die, but that does not mean that the camera has to linger on her guts for more than five seconds_. _

In addition to being unnecessarily gory, the movie is also terribly boring and apparently without even a pinch of plot. Why on earth Ban should have chosen it?

On the screen, a zombie assaults a man and detaches his head with his teeth, and the crowd around King screams. In the front row, a girl nearly jumps on her boyfriend's lap. Oh, King sighs. Of course. Ban is probably holding a terrified Elaine by now, encouraging her and showing how brave he is. At least, King is not with them. That's probably the only good thing in the entire situation.

He watches with increasing annoyance a group of people running for their lives on a road. A boy trips, apparently on nothing, and falls on the ground. Clearly, all he does is screaming like an idiot, and he doesn't even try to get up. He's soon reached by a bunch of zombies and eaten alive.

King snorts, someone screams, and, next to him, someone ... laughs? He turns, just to see a girl pressing a hand on her mouth, clearly amused. Then, when a man tries to defeat a particularly ugly zombie with a belt and obviously dies, she bursts into laughs.

King wonders why he didn't notice her before. He can't really see her in the dark theater, but he can say she's beautiful. Her hairs are dark, and come down on her shoulders like a cascade of silk. Her eyes are big, full of amusement, and King wonders what's their color. And besides, she is the only person around him that doesn't seem terrified by the movie, but, on the contrary, seems to have fun.

At that moment, she notices his stare. King winces and feels himself blushing, but he does not – well, he can't – look away. She makes a shy smile, looking at him.

"Isn't that stupid? I mean, what he was thinking? A belt?" She can't hold back a giggle. "Seriously?" She keeps looking at him, and King realizes that he should probably say something. Possibly without panicking.

"Yeah, that was pretty stupid, " he finally manages to mutter.

"Right?" She smiles again, and King decides that she is definitely the most gorgeous girl he has ever seen, even though he still can't get a good look at her.

"However, you should consider that this movie is probably the most idiotic thing ever made," he murmurs then, "we can't pretend that the characters are capable of thinking."

The girl laughs again. "That's it! I mean, can we talk about the girl in the greenhouse? Seriously, who would believe that a greenhouse is good hiding from zombies?"  
"I don't think I want to know that." King smiles probably for the first time in the evening. Then the crowd screams again and his gaze gets back on the screen. He doesn't understand exactly what has happened when he wasn't looking, but now the camera is focused on a pile of zombies eating ... things. He can't really say which anatomical parts are shown. "Why in this movie there has to be so much blood? That not makes it scarier!" King mutters, disgusted.

He hears the girl's giggling. "Yeah, you're right. And all this is so fake! They really think this is impressive?"

"That's more disgusting. This movie sucks in everything."

"It indeed sucks, but I think it's kind of fun. I mean ... look at this!" The girl's hand lands on his shoulder – she is touching him! – while she points something on the screen. A  
woman is surrounded and holds a gun with shaking hands. But she doesn't even try to shoot: she just spins around threatening the zombies for a whole fifteen seconds, until a zombie grips her and the gun falls.

They both laugh this time, so loud that someone in the front row turns around and murmurs something that sounds like, "quiet!". But King can't stop giggling, and it seems that the girl is in the same condition.

" What the hell did she want to do with that gun?" The girl asks when they both have stopped laughing.

"Well, all I know is that she really didn't want to shout", King answers, trying to catch his breath.

She chuckles again. "And threatening the zombies ... why she thought it was a good move?"

"Because in this movie everyone is an idiot," King explains. "If there was some intelligent person here, it would have ended at minute ten."

"And that would be a tragedy", she teases.

"Indeed. I really needed an awful and annoying zombie movie tonight," he answers sarcastically.

"Yeah, me too. I would have probably died without this," she gestures at the screen, "work of art."

They giggle again. King is surprised by the ease with which he can talk with her. He's not usually so open with strangers. Well, he's not so at ease even with some of his few friends. But this ... this feels natural.

"But seriously," the girl says, now with a calmer tone of voice, "how did you end up here? You don't seem really interested in all this."

King hesitates, not knowing how to explain his current situation without making fool of himself.

The girl misunderstands his silence. "You don't have to tell me anything, really. I was just curious," she murmurs, slightly embarrassed. Her hand finds a lock of hair and raises them like she's trying to cover her face.

King thinks that this is the cutest thing she could make, then he really understands what she said and abruptly shakes his head. "It's not like this! It's just ... well. It's kinda embarrassing," he whispers, and he can feel that his cheeks are burning. He thanks the fact that the theater is dark.

The girl seems to relax a bit. "Well," she begins, "it can't be so bad. I mean, look at me. I'm the third wheel."

"You what?" King asks, surprised. "How that happened?"

She shrugs. "You know, my best friend and I wanted to go out tonight. Her boyfriend called her and asked her to go watch this ... thing. I told her to go and have fun, but she was so sorry about letting me alone that she basically dragged me here. And then the theater was full, and we got separated. Well, not that I care so much, because it would be pretty awkward to sit next to them. They are very, hum, affectionate."

King can't stop himself to chuckle, and the girl glares at him. "Really? I share with you this tragic story and you laugh at me?" She sounds extremely offended. "I trusted you!"

"No, wait!" King hurries to say, "I didn't mean it, I swear!" His voice probably sounds too much worried, because this time is the girl who chuckles.

"I'm kidding! I know it's pretty funny".

"It's not that," King mutters. He's relieved by the fact he didn't offend her. "The fact is ... I'm the third wheel too."

"No!" She exclaims, maybe a bit too loud, because a man behind them whisper something like, "shut up!". The girl covers her mouth with a hand, then leans towards King and whispers, "Really? You too?"

"And that's not the worst part," he continues, lowering his voice. Her eyes widen, and she stares at him curiously. King takes a breath, then blurts it. "I'm here with my sister and her boyfriend."

The girl opens her mouth and stares at him for a moment, then she bursts into laughs. "Oh my ... ", she tries to speak, but she can't stop herself and continues to giggle. And, for the first time since his uncle has forced him in this ridiculous position, King begins to thinks that it's actually funny.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry ...", the girl starts again, and this time her voice is firmer. "I didn't want to make fun of you, just ... I didn't imagine something like that. It sounds horrible."

"It's all right," says King, and he can't stop himself from smiling to her. "All this is just zany, I know."

She returns the smile, then murmurs, "But how did you get into this?"

"My uncle. He is a bit overprotective of my sister, and when he discovered that she wanted to go out with her boyfriend tonight he basically forced me to join them."

"Oh, I see," she says, then she can't stop another grin. "You're probably the only person worse off than me in this theater."

"I bet I am," he answers, grinning. "And, of course, this horrible movie was chosen by my sister's boyfriend."

"Of course," she rolls her eyes. "Look, I'm here because my best friend's boyfriend wanted absolutely to watch this. I think he just wanted an excuse to cuddle with her, since she is terrified by movies like this."

"Yes, that's probably the only reason someone would want to go watch it."

He glances at the screen, only to see a group of persons stuck on the top of a skyscraper. Clearly, they are surrounded by zombies. King turns towards the girl and gestures at the screen. "This is even more ridiculous!"

"Yes! How did they-" but she can't finish her sentence, because the guy next to her turns and glares at them. "Can you just shut up?" he jerks, "Someone would like to watch the movie!"

They both stiffen, and the girl nods rapidly. When the guy returns looking at the screen, she looks at King. They exchange a glance before blustering to giggle.

The rest of the movie passes like this. They remark on the character and their stupid decisions, and they often end up laughing out loud. The persons sitting next to them don't seem pleased, but they both don't care.

The time passes incredibly faster than before, and when the movie finally ends – clearly with an unnecessary explosion – King feels almost disappointed. The lights turn on and he can't stop himself from really look at the girl. How she can be more beautiful than he expected? That shouldn't be possible. She glances at him, and he can finally see her eyes, which are some particular shade of purple. He had never seen a color like this.

She smiles and gets up. "Well, it was a pleasure to watch this wonderful movie with you!"

He stands too, now suddenly shy. It was all easier before! "Yes, it was incredibly fun", he mumbles, then manages to return her smile. "Thank you."

Her smile widens, and her cheeks flush red. "No, thank you."

At this point, King doesn't know what to do. The smarter move would be asking her number, but he can't convince himself to do such a thing, and before he can find something else to say the girl jumps and turns, then she waves to someone. She looks again at King and she makes an apologetic smile. "My friend is calling me," she gestures towards a girl whit silver hairs, who's looking at them, "I should probably go."

"Yeah," King says, "I should go too. My sister is likely looking for me." His location is probably the last thing Elaine is thinking right now, but he really doesn't know what else to say.

"Well, then I'll go. Hum, good-bye", she smiles one last time, then turns and walks away.

King remains still for a moment, looking at her. She approaches the silver-haired girl, and the two of them move towards the exit. Finally, King blinks and registers what happened. All he can think is that he's the biggest idiot on earth. Why he didn't ask her number? He doesn't even know her name! If Helbram finds out about this, he will probably punch him, then he'll tell him that he is stupid and that he will never find a girlfriend. Then, he will tease him for months. He sighs, fighting the impulse to punch himself, then decides to go find Elaine and Ban. There is no much more he can do.

After ten minutes, the theater is empty and there is still no trace of the two of them. King now is really irritated and just wants to go home. He exits the movie theater and looks around, but they are not even there. Nervously, he checks his mobile. Maybe they're looking for him too. Actually, he founds two messages, both have been sent two hours before, minutes after the beginning of the movie.

**From: Ban****  
****Ahahaha, we fooled you!**

**From: Elaine**  
**I'm sorry that we tricked you, but we need to spend some time alone, so we left. I swear uncle Gloxinia won't know about that!****  
****See you later, okay? **

King's first instinct is to scream. The second is to find them and murder Ban in the most painful way he can find – it doesn't matter if he's far taller and stronger than King, there has to be a way; then scold a bit his little sister. The fact is, he has no idea about where they could be and he's also too tired to think about it. Still, he will revenge. To be forced to watch that terrible movie for nothing is not something he can pass over. Even if in the end it was really nice, thanks to the girl.

He sighs again. Maybe it's not a big deal. Maybe he can call Helbram and catch him, wherever he is, and then join Elaine when she will decide to return back home. That should work.

"Are you all right?"

King nearly jumps, caught off guard, and turns. Next to him stands the girl which whom he watched the movie; she's looking at him, curious, her head slightly tilted and her hands joined behind her back.

King stares at her, too surprised for answering her question until she raises an eyebrow. "Oh, yes, I'm sorry," he mutters. He feels his cheeks burning, again, and he curses himself for being so awkward. "Hum, what are you doing here?"

This time, he's surprised to see that she is the one who blushes. "Well," she starts, a little hesitant, "you know, my friends wanted to go home. Together." She put a certain emphasis on the last word. "So I let them go, and I, hum, I didn't know what to do, and so I waited." Like before, she lifts a lock of hair in front of her face, nervously.

King needs a few seconds to really understand what she's saying. "You were waiting for me?" He asks incredulously when he finally manages to get it.

If possible, she seems even more embarrassed. "Well, we had fun together, and before I didn't have the chance to ask your name. I know you're with your sister and you'll probably have to leave, but-"

"I'm on my own", he interrupts her, maybe with too much emphasis.

"Oh?"

"... that's really embarassing, but, apparently, they left shortly after the movie started. You know, they needed 'some time alone'", he quickly explains, still a bit annoyed.

"No! Seriously?", the girl starts giggling, covering her mouth with a hand. King can't help but smiles back, and he finally relaxes.

"Yes. I'm starting to think that I'm the worst big brother ever."

"Well, I won't say that. Your sister is probably happy now."

"I don't want to think about that," he makes a face, and the girl chuckles again.

"So, I suppose that now you're free to do whatever you want ..."

"Yes, I think so."

"Well, since we're both alone, we could go eating something together", she proposes and looks at him with hopeful eyes.

"Seriously? I mean, of course! It would be great," he stammers, surprised. She's asking _him _out? That has to be a dream. He probably died while watching that awful movie.

"Good," she smiles again. Then, she offers him her hand. "Shall we go?"

All King can manage to say is a faint "yes", before holding her hand.

"Ah, wait", he says abruptly, as soon as he recovers his ability to speak, "I don't ... what's your name?"

"Oh my God, you're right! I'm Diane. Nice to meet you," she answers with a grin. "And you are ...?"

"The name is Harlequin, but generally people call me King," he shrugs, "it's easier."

"Harlequin," she repeats, slowly, and King thinks that his name has never sounded like this. "I like it. Well, now we should really hurry. I don't know about you, but I'm starving."

"Yeah, me too, " he smirks, then holds her hand a little more tightly. "Let's go."


End file.
